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Even though mankind is sometimes called a polygamous animal by nature when other mammals are recognized to be monogamous, marriage affairs are always a big deal and for good reasons. A marriage affair can be quite disastrous, and then comes the decision making of should I go or should I stay.

The reason why it’s so hard to get over an affair in marriage is just that, we are not polygamous by our very nature just like some of the mammals and birds as mentioned above, but because we have a strong tendency to think that we are we do commit adultery and then regret it.

The truth is that it’s very hard to get over an affair because it affects us emotionally, physically and psychologically, and all our senses are in turmoil when we are the one who has been cheated on.

When it comes to make the right decision for you about whether you should stay or not in the marriage, I would not advise you to ask other people outside of the marriage about what you should do. At the end of the day, only you and your spouse are concerned about what would be best for you both and especially for the spouse who has been cheated on.

In this article you will understand better why you are the best person to make this kind of decision, and what ever you may decide will be based on what is best for you, not for your friends or family.

The first thing that people who have been cheated on might be thinking is that they want things to get back to what they used to be. But frankly this would be a mistake because you must remember that what things used to be is when the affair occurred, so the best thing to do at this point might be the opposite and try to do things different.

One of the worse thing you could do though, is ask someone outside of the marriage about what you should do. Each individual has his or her own opinion about affairs and how to react about it, but that would only reflect their own ideas, not yours. Only two people can make this kind of decision and it’s you and your spouse. And ultimately only you can make the decision to stay in the marriage or to leave it.

Leaving the marriage or staying what is best?

Of course various things need to be considered before you can make the final decision about leaving the marriage or staying in it. The first and foremost thing is, is your husband or wife still in love with you?

If the reason for the affair is lack of love, it would be very difficult to rebuild a real relationship on lack of love. On the other hand, if there is still love between you and your spouse everything is possible even after an affair.

Another important question to ask is if the affair is totally over with without a doubt. If you have any doubt that this is the case, you need to make sure in order to make room for reconciliation.

Is the cheating spouse truly sorry? If the cheating spouse doesn’t feel truly sorry and finding excuses for their action, is there any room for trust that they won’t do it again?

For more helpful advice surviving an affair visit my site on how to rebuild your marriage.